I Hope You Dance: Steps

I Hope You Dance:
Steps

Lin

"Ahem."
Sam's door lightly tapped the wall as a hand pushed inward. Sam stared at the woman smiling smugly at him from the doorway. He swallowed the panic he felt invading his chest as she walked into the office nimbly. "Mallory."
"Sam." She sat in the chair across from him.
"What are you doing here?" He asked nervously.
"Do I need a reason?"
"To be *here*? Yeah."
Mallory sighed. "I thought I'd stop by and see my father---"
"No, here, in this office."
Mallory frowned. "I can't be here?"
Sam leaned back in his seat, taking stock of the woman in his office. "Since there is no us, I just wondered why you felt the need to stop by."
She stared at him with troubled eyes. "I thought we were friends, Sam." Mallory licked her lips nervously.
"Is that what you call it?" Sam muttered.
"Why are you acting like this?"
"Acting like what?"
"Like you have a big chip on your shoulder and now you're taking it out on me!"
"I do not have a chip on my shoulder. In fact," Sam let his chair snap forward, "this is the best I have felt in months."
"Oh," Mallory murmured.
"Yeah," Sam confirmed.
"Well, maybe I should just be going." She made her way to the door but stopped when she heard him speak.
"You don't have to leave."
She held her folded coat to her chest and stared down at him, her eyes glazed over with hurt. "You obviously would rather not have me here. I'll just go."
"Mallory, I shouldn't have said that. I apologize."
"For what?"
"I shouldn't have attacked you."
"And I guess I shouldn't have baited you like I did," she admitted reluctantly. Mallory sat down again. "I really only came to talk."
"About what?"
"That night at the Kennedy Center."
"Mallory," Sam said incredulously. "It was months ago. Let it go."
"Yeah, but I shouldn't have said some of those things."
"Like?"
"I shouldn't have thrown my relationship in your face."
"No, you shouldn't have."
"But---"
"Does this have a point somewhere in it?"
"Yes, I'm getting there now. I was really hurt after I saw the picture in the newspaper with you and that woman."
"Laurie."
"Laurie. I thought I'd at least get a phone call, a note, something from you explaining what was going on and when I didn't---"
"Did you ever think to call me?"
Mallory's head snapped up. "What?"
Sam leaned forward. "Why didn't you call me?"
Her voice reached a fevered pitch. "Why should I have called you?"
"Why not?"
"Because I'm not the one who ended up in the paper with a call girl, Sam. I was embarrassed. I thought the least you could do was show a little common decency and call me."
"Sorry, I didn't think it was a good time."
"And when would a good time have been?"
"Never," Sam offered weakly.
Mallory pursed her lips. "You're right. I shouldn't have come here. I wanted to have a civilized conversation and all we seem to do is attack one another." She gathered her purse in her hand. "Sam, it was nice knowing you."
"Don't go anywhere." Mallory froze. "Truthfully, why did you come to see me?"
"Don't you have a speech to write or something?"
"Actually, I have many things to do, but since you have taken the time to come here and *talk*-- Did you schedule an appointment?--I want to know the reason behind this visit."
"I already told you."
"No, you haven't. Does this have something to do with that guy you were seeing?"
"Richard?"
"Whatever."
"No, it doesn't. And when do I have to explain anything to you?"
"When you come barging in my office in the middle of the afternoon to have a chat, Mallory. What did you expect to happen?"
"I thought we could talk."
"Talk about what? My love life?"
"That's not what I meant Sam. I really do consider you a friend and I was hoping we wouldn't lose that."
"No, we haven't. But you've got to realize, things have changed inextricably. Where are we supposed to go from here?"
"We aren't supposed to go anywhere," Mallory quietly said.
"Don't get me wrong, I would love to be friends with you but I have to know, are you looking for something more?"
"No, Sam. That's not what I meant."
"I had to ask."
Mallory sighed. "I know you did." Pause. "So, are you going to tell me?"
Sam looked up in surprise. "Tell you what?"
"The new woman in your life, Sam." She rolled her eyes. "There's someone else, isn't there? Laurie?"
Sam shifted uncomfortably. "No, why would you think that?"
"It's not Laurie?" Mallory's eyebrows rose. "Oh. Then who else could it be?"
"Mallory, stop playing this game. There is no one."
"Yes, there is. You always blush like that when you get defensive."
Sam reached up to feel his face. "What? I am not blushing. And how would you know when I blush about anything?"
"Yes, you are. You're embarrassed by something."
"Let's not get into this."
She pouted. "You don't think I can keep a secret?"
"Mallory, it's not that. It's just there are some things we would rather keep between us."
"Aha! So there is someone."
"I didn't say that."
"Yeah, but you said we and I would assume you wouldn't want this new relationship to leak into the spotlight."
"Mallory, our relationship won't leak into the spotlight, as you so astutely put it."
"Yes, but the fact that you're worrying about it at all would lead me to believe that it's someone in the White House."
"No."
"Don't worry, you don't have to tell me."
"No, I really don't."
"Did you think I couldn't handle it?"
"What?"
"Telling me. Did you think I couldn't handle you telling me you were seeing someone."
"You're in a relationship with someone else. Frankly, I didn't think you would care one way or the other."
"That hurts, Sam. I'm always looking out for your well-being."
"If that's true, why did you flaunt your relationship in my face."
"You're serious?"
"Why shouldn't I be?"
"I just didn't think you took what, two dates, that seriously."
"Mallory, someone told me that we have to take each relationship seriously, no matter how it turned out because each relationship with someone is special."
"She's smart."
"Who?"
"Your girlfriend."
"She's not my girlfriend."
"Whatever you call it. But she's right. I just didn't think..."
"Let's drop it."
"No, I want to apologize for being rude that night."
"You weren't rude. I was the rude one. I should have called you and you were lashing out at me. I completely understand."
"Thank you, oh great one." Mallory told him dryly. "I'm happy to see you got your degree in psychology while you were writing your speeches and hanging out with call girls."
"That was uncalled for."
Mallory shrugged. "True, but too easy to pass up. I shouldn't have said anything about Richard. I could have let bygones be bygones."
Sam grinned. "But then you wouldn't be you."
Mallory gasped in surprise. "Are you saying I was acting like a scorned woman?" A small smile shone on her face.
"Nah, you were acting like you always do. It gets to be quite endearing at times, otherwise, I think your parents would have thrown you out of the house by the time you were 15."
"I'm surprised they haven't thrown any of you guys out of the White House yet," she observed shrewdly.
"We're just lucky, I guess."
"Listen, you want to get some lunch?"
"Lunch? Sam repeated slowly. "What time is it?"
She rolled her eyes. "Get a watch. It's almost 1:00."
"1:00?"
"Yeah. Is something wrong with that?"
"No, uh, let me go check with Toby. We can go down to the Mess."
"Oh yippee." She watched him leave the office.
*~*
"Hey, CJ."
"What do you want?"
Danny sidled into her office. "Is that any way to talk to me?"
CJ peered at him over her glass rims, just barely taking her eyes off of the folder in front of her. "To you? Yeah."
"How long are you going to stay mad at me?"
"How long do you think we'll be in office?"
"That long, huh?"
"You're darn tootin'."
"CJ, where in the hell did you grow up?" Danny laughed.
"Shut up. What did you want?" CJ leaned back in her chair.
"Let's go out."
"I can't."
"Why not?"
"Because I said so."
"And that would be because..."
"Danny, don't give up your day job. Go ask someone out in the Bullpen. I'm sure they would be happy to go out with you."
He held his hand up to his chest. "You wound me. To think I would settle for second best. Tsk, tsk."
"Well, there's always someone out there in the Bullpen who will." She ignored the withering glance he shot her. "But I have work to do in here and you're distracting me."
"Why don't you just tell me you're seeing someone? I won't say another word and you won't get another invitation from me."
CJ carefully sat her file down, stood up, and leaned over her desk until she was face to face with Danny. "I am seeing someone. Get over it."
"See, that wasn't so hard, was it?" He plopped onto her couch. "Going to tell me who the lucky guy is?"
"Danny, didn't you say you were going to go away or something?"
"Or something," he answered. "I said I wouldn't ask you out anymore. What I didn't promise was not to ask who the guy was."
She grinned at him. "Who said it was a guy?"
"Ooh, and to think I was pouring my attentions on you---"
"Can it, Danny. It's a guy," CJ cut him off.
"And I can't get any more than that?"
"And how am I supposed to know it's not going to end up in some gossip column tomorrow? And anyway, what gives you the right to question me about who I see?"
"First off, I don't write for the gossip section---"
"Close enough," he heard her mutter.
"Secondly, we share custody of our fish. I thought I could find out what kind of guy is trying to take my place."
"First off, Danny, Gail is my fish. Second thing, it's none of your business who I am seeing."
"So, it's that serious, huh?"
CJ's face burned crimson. "What?"
"It's serious. Why didn't you tell me so?" He spread his arms along the top of the couch. "I take it your colleagues don't know who it is, do they?"
"Why would it be any of their business either?"
"One of them would probably run a background check on him."
"See, this is why no one wants to tell you guys anything around here. Especially about who we women are dating. The first thing out of everyone's mouths is background check."
"CJ, it wouldn't hurt if you knew something a little bit more about the guy."
"Now you're starting to sound like Josh."
"I hear he's a rather smart guy."
"And a bit psycho when it comes to men dating the women in his life."
"Who could blame him?" Danny leaned forward. "It's just, no one wants to see you get hurt."
"I won't get hurt Danny." CJ softened. "Thanks for your concern, but I am capable of taking care of myself."
"I know you are, which is why I'm still looking out for you." He stood up. "I'm gonna---"
"CJ."
They both turned to find Sam in the doorway, Mallory off to one side. He stood frozen as he noticed Danny in CJ's office.
"Sam?"
"Uh, oh, I was just going to tell you, I'm going down to the Mess with Mallory."
CJ smiled. "OK."
"OK." Sam took one last look at Danny and walked off.
"Yeah, as I was saying, I'm going to go now."
"Finally," CJ mutters.
"Yeah," Danny grinned. He walked to her wall and stared at it for a second. "I think I already told you I liked this picture."
CJ's head snapped up and followed his gaze until her eyes fell on the portrait of her and Sam. "Danny..."
"Don't worry about it. My lips are sealed. See ya."
*~*
"Do we ever eat anything that's home-cooked?"
CJ held the box up to her face and let the smells drift into her nose. "No, I don't think so. Not in the past year anyway. Eat up."
"I am eating," Sam told her, his mouth stuffed with food.
"OK. You want something to drink?"
"Nah, then I won't be able to finish this."
Silence.
"I saw Mallory was in the West Wing today."
"Yeah," Sam confirmed. "She dropped by after she saw Leo."
"Oh, she did?"
"Yeah, why? Are you jealous?"
CJ made a face at him. "No, I was just wondering---"
"We had lunch down in the Mess."
"In the Mess?" CJ wrinkled her nose. "Why down there?"
"Because no one wanted to leave."
CJ grinned. "Lazy."
Sam shook his head. "No, just busy." Silence. "So, uh, I saw Danny was in your office."
She rolled her eyes. "Yeah, he wanted to ask me out for the fiftieth time."
Sam didn't meet her eyes. "You should go out with him."
"What?!" CJ almost yelled.
Sam tried to stifle his laugh. "Why not? He's an attractive man. You're an attractive woman. You should go out."
"But---" CJ faltered.
"What about us?" He finished for her.
"Yeah, what about us? How can there be an *us* when we keep going out with different people?"
Sam's eyebrows rose. "You're going out with someone else?"
"No," CJ lightly slapped his arm. "But you were with Mallory for lunch today and now you're telling me I should go out with Danny. Is it just me, or do we have a seriously warped relationship?"
"No, it's just you," Sam leaned over and kissed her lightly.
CJ kissed him back softly and then leaned back. "What was that for?"
"For being you."
"Well then, don't I deserve more than that?"
"Probably," Sam confirmed. "But for right now..."
"Keep eating."
"Tell me, why should I go out with Danny?"
"Because he wants to go out with you."
"But that would be leading him on."
"He knows you're not interested. You've made yourself abundantly clear, more than once."
CJ sat her box down on the table. "Yeah, but it wouldn't be right. I just wouldn't feel good about doing it to him."
"You wouldn't be doing anything to him. He asked; you accept. Why does it have to be any more than that?"
CJ sighed. "Because he thinks it might be more and I don't want to hurt him like that." She leaned on his shoulder, forcing him to relinquish his food.
"I think you don't give him enough credit, CJ." Sam wrapped his arm around her body, pulling her closer. "He knows."
"You're right, he does know."
"About us?"
"Yeah, isn't that what you meant?"
"Actually, no, that's not what I meant. He *knows*?" Sam asked in alarm.
CJ snuggled in his arms. "He's a reporter. It didn't take much to put two and two together. I think he has suspected for quite a while, he just never had proof until today."
"Proof of what? What does he think he saw?"
"Oh, suck it up, Sam. It's not like it isn't true." Pause. "But it does bring up another important point."
"And that would be?"
"When we do tell everyone?"
"What is there to tell?"
"That we're seeing each other."
"I thought we agreed it wasn't important anyone else knew."
"No, it isn't," CJ agreed. "But I would much rather have it come out of our mouths than someone else's. Josh is my friend. So is Toby. What would they think when they find out we have been keeping this from them?"
"They'll be understanding and know why they weren't told from the beginning. If it wasn't for that damned photograph, no one would ever know."
"I don't think there would be an us if it wasn't for that photograph."
Sam settled his chin on top of her head. "Which one?"
"Both if them. I guess Abbey did know what she was doing. We really need to send her a nice note."
"And then she would be the next person to know."
"No, she should be the first person we should tell."
"Why?"
"Because she schemed to get those pictures developed fast."
"How did she know?" Sam asked.
"Women's intuition."
"Is that some catch-all answer only women can give."
CJ smiled. "Pretty much."
"You're pretty cute, you know that?"
"Where did this come from?"
"What?" Sam asked innocently.
"This thing. You try to distract me by saying nice things about me."
"I thought that's what would have been the nice thing to say, but if you want me to say---"
CJ laid a finger on his lips, effectively quieting him. "No, that's not what I want. You're pretty damned handsome yourself."
"Thanks." He grabbed her finger and kissed it gently. "Let's concentrate on each other right now."
"I think I can do that."
Sam leaned down and caught her lips in his own. They hungrily fed off of each other for a few moments until CJ pulled away, panting lightly. "Are we going to do this, Sam?"
"Do what?"
"Commit."
Sam swallowed, "Yes."
"And?"
"And what?"
"Are we going to make this real?"
"What do you mean?"
"Sam, I asked you once before and you pushed me away. What about now?"
"Are you sure about this? It's not too early?"
"If it wasn't, I wouldn't bring this up."
"You're sure?"
"Yes."
"Let's do it." He dipped back down to reclaim CJ's lips but first he murmured softly against them, "It was already real, CJ. The whole time."

I Hope You Dance: Criss-Crossed

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