King of the Mountain: Part 33


Lynn Jepsen


Alice is trying to spin me. It's not working. I liked this woman. I liked
this woman if for no other reason than she scared the hell out of Sam and
Josh. She called me subservient. She's also telling me it was taken
completely out of context. Bull. Just because I want to spend time with
my daughter, and, you know, don't tie Sam to the bed when I'm mad at him,
is no reason to throw insults in the press. Josh is worried that I'm
going to do something public and irritating. He's completely off-base.
I'm going to do something totally private and malevolent. Completely
different things really.

Of course, I've got other things to take care of first. Top of the list
is planning ways to avoid visiting Sam's mother. Given the fact that she
stood around while Sam had a completely cruel upbringing doesn't seem to
phase her, plus the fact that she didn't see her son for over a decade,
you might think she'd feel unqualified giving parenting advice. You would
also be wrong. After that first threat, well, the first one Margaret
didn't destroy before it reached Sam's desk, we went to visit his mother.
This woman... This woman reminds me why I love my mother - quirks,
attitude, opinions, and all - and why I never want to spend Christmas in
Long Beach.

She spent two days regaling me with tales of Sam's happy childhood and
telling me everything I did wrong with Samantha. Believe me when I tell
you the things my own mind did to me after she died were worse than
anything she could have come up with. I just couldn't believe that this
woman would try to tell me how to raise my child. She actually suggested
that I should let her watch Elle while we campaigned. Over my dead body.

How exactly does one tell their spouse that their mother-in-law is a
slug?

Josh asked to see me this morning, and I think I know why. I refused
Secret Service protection and Josh has appointed himself Director of the
Change-Lisa's-Mind campaign. It's not that I want to give Sam and Josh
additional gray hairs, it's just that I want to be able to work, and it's
really hard to be discrete with an army trailing behind you. Besides,
they wanted to inspect the courthouse. It was a Nancy Reagan moment. I
just said no.

When I walk into the bullpen, Diana is sitting on a desk, and she snags
me as I walk by. "Mrs. Seaborn, do you have a minute?" Sure. I'm not that
anxious to yell at Josh in the first place. "I, uh, you know that
fundraiser in Dallas on Saturday?" Yes, I do. CJ and I bought dresses. I
even convinced Ramon to babysit. "I was wondering if you knew who Josh
was taking." Oh, well, I, uh, heard some rumor that he's going with Joey
Lucas. "Oh." If you want to ask him, ask him. "Oh, I... I couldn't. Ramon
was wanting to take Rachel though, 'cause she's never gotten to go to one
of the fundraisers, so I could watch Elle." Diana. Breathe. We'll stick
Elle with an agent if necessary. Ask him. That's an order.

I'm sure she'd have more to say on the matter, but Toby bellows and once
the roof finishes shaking, Diana jumps off the desk and darts into his
cubicle. God, I hate Alabama.

Sam is sprawled across the bed when I stumble in at three. How on earth
did he get home before I did? "They cancelled the speech. I was going to
drive out to your thing, but Elle was lonely." Lonely? Sam, she's a baby.
She still thinks Josh and Toby are sweethearts. I'm not buying this. "I
thought we could.... bond?" Aaaaah. That's adorable. He grabs my wrist
then, and pulls me down on the bed beside him. "Can you go twenty-four
hours without mocking me?" Nope. Now, if I kiss you, will you stop
whining? He doesn't answer, but he does kiss me, and I'm thinking if we
want sleep, we're going to have to wait until the flight to Texas,
because I'm not feeling all that tired, and Sam's acting.... I think he's
awake. Definitely awake.

*

You know, as a white, English, well-educated woman living in the United
States, I used to think that the Israelis and Arabs could just get along.
Then I went to Israel. They can't. Entire generations would have to be
replaced by pod people before that would happen. Nevertheless, I am glued
to CNN with everyone else on the plane. Glasscock is going to address the
country tonight, and I have to wonder what that means. All anyone knows
for sure is that as we watch, an assortment of missiles are being flung
around Israel, and Palestine, and who knows where else.

I can feel Sam's presence beside me, and when he leans against my
shoulder, I can't quite hear the news over Josh's sudden shouts. We turn
together, and catch of glimpse of him storming around through the rear of
the plane. Sam holds me back as I start back towards him, and shakes his
head. "We've been waiting to hear back from Alice. I'm guessing she...."
Commented on the situation before speaking to us? "Yeah." Damn.


King of the Mountain: Part 34

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